IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?

 

I sit here, the morning of April 22, 2022, awaiting yet another winter storm.  This has been going on for so long that my sense of reality is starting to slip.  I know that people around the world perceive Canada as the land of perpetual winter, but up until recently I thought I knew better.  We DO have distinct other seasons!  We DO have spring!  We DO have summer!  And we DO have my very favourite, autumn!  Winter is just one of four.

This year though, it seems that Mother Nature has other ideas. 

Did she just realize that all those prayers to fill up the dugouts were on back order and needed to be taken care of?  Is green not the ‘in’ colour for 2022?  Is she testing the survival instincts of all the poor birds who flew north expecting warm temperatures and available food?  Was the internet running short of stuck tractor pictures? Did Old Man Winter dare her to do it one more time?  Is she off her meds?

 I’m not sure that this eternal winter would be so painful if my Facebook memories weren’t full of years when April actually featured spring-like conditions.  Apparently six years ago I was installing a rock pathway/border around a flower bed and we were putting metal roofing on the quonset.   On numerous years the snow banks – even the ones in the trees – were gone.  Regular spring jobs were getting done: the lawnmower was being serviced, gardens were being tilled, outdoor Christmas decorations were being put away.

So far in 2022 none of these things have happened.  Not only are the snow banks still here, but they are being refurbished on a regular basis.  There was a short period of time when some of my gardens were visible, but only in the form of frozen mud.  The driveway has had to be cleared twice since we thought winter was over – and in all probability it will need it again once Mother Nature is over this next hissy fit.

I know this is slightly out of character for me, but I’m crying “uncle” here.  I want this nonsense to stop.  This is me saying ‘enough already!’

Prairie people are a little weather crazy.  We are not ones to shy away from the forces of nature.  We know our skies are big, our spaces immense, our weather extreme.  We bond over weather stories.  It’s the first topic of conversation when we meet each other.  I would wager that we possess, consult, and rely on more weather apps than anyone else on the planet.  Our whole mentality is to know how to survive (and then brag about) all weather adversity.  We are the ones who shake our fists at the sky after a hail storm flattens our crops and gardens and yell “Is that all you got?”  (I did mention we were crazy, didn’t I?)

This time though, Mother Nature seems to be using a new tactic.  We have proved we can handle the flash-in-the-pan power of summer storms, the crazy trampoline-wrecking winds, the baseball sized hail, and the stay-off-the-roads blizzards, so she has decided to wear us down with boring repetition.  How many spring blizzards is this in a row?  I’ve lost count.

I’ve even noticed that the weather forecasters, people known for their enthusiasm and hype of storm systems, are down-playing this next one.  Except for slightly warmer temperatures and therefore a higher potential for rain in some areas, this storm is every bit as bad as the last one – worse considering the winds are supposed to be higher – and yet instead of billing it as the once-in-30-years storm their comments are all low key.  It’s like they’ve heard what happens to the messenger and are trying to distance themselves.

But, the storm is headed this way all the same, and there’s really nothing to do.  We can’t stop it and all the preparations we did last week are all still in place. 

We are left with a “Bring it on!” attitude and the sincere hope that this one will get winter out of her system.